Gebran Bassil’s beard

In recent days Lebanese eyes have had a carnival of activities to look at. There has been Saad Hariri’s decision to announce a government lineup; the opposition’s ascent to Beiteddine to discuss the matter with the president; Hariri’s threats to step down if his project is completely overhauled; and much else. However, the topic prompting the most chatter in the republic’s homes is Gebran Bassil’s beard.

Well not quite a beard, rather the first spirited shoots of one. At a gathering of Aounist parliamentarians and ministers on Wednesday, Farid al-Khazen could be seen smiling at Gebran and gesturing at his chin, apparently commenting on the beard. The exchange was full of interesting possibilities, since Khazen is one of two Maronites whom Hariri has named as a minister, and if the Aounists manage to alter the prime minister-elect’s lineup in order to get Bassil into the next cabinet, it is probably Khazen who would lose his portfolio.

Why? Because the other Maronite named from the Aounist bloc is Alain Aoun, and it would not be easy for Michel Aoun to bump his nephew in favor of his son in law –particularly as both cordially dislike each other and control sizable constituencies within the Free Patriotic Movement. If that’s the case, it might be Khazen who stops shaving, even though he doubtless merits a ministry more than most of the other Aounists.

Humorists with less imagination have observed that Bassil may be growing a beard in order to feel more at ease in the presence of his Hezbollah comrades. After all, when he sits with Mohammad Raad, Hussein al-Hajj Hassan, and Wafiq Safa, whose closely-cut stubble underscores hard faces, the faces of real men, Bassil comes across looking like Bambi, soft and pubescent among the television projectors.

It’s difficult to take that argument seriously. As any man will tell you, a beard is a statement. There are many kinds of beards, however, which determine what the statement is. There are the lifelong beards, those that age and die on a man’s cheeks. They are the ones that become part of an individual’s persona, accumulating the dust of time and the stains of bygone eras. A man with a “lifer” is the professional among beard wearers.

A second category of beard is those wearers will keep on most of the time, but not all. Because of this variability, the beard will rarely be grown to full length, its owner preferring to keep it trimmed down to a fuzzy stump, in a no-man’s land between being bearded and clean-shavedness.

Then there are the beards of novices among beard wearers. Such men will grow a full-length beard and become bored with it before chopping it off after a sudden onset of doubt. They may then re-grow it, shape it in innovative ways, fiddle, fuss, and then swear never to grow one again.

The lifelong beard grower is generally a man of habit and persistence; someone well organized who tends to be consistent. The owner of the no-man’s land beard is more innovative, willing to embrace variety, but still steady in his choices. The novice beard grower, in turn, tends to be flighty, impulsive, ambitious but quick to doubt his own ways.

So what kind of beard is Gebran Bassil going for? What political statement is he making? A great deal will depend on whether he is given a ministerial portfolio – which Saad Hariri has made a red line if he is to pursue his endeavors to reach a deal over the current government. If Bassil stays home, his beard is likely to be of the third kind –short-lived, an object of hatred at the bad luck it brought on. If Hariri is forced to hand him a portfolio, though, Bassil may hold on to his bush longer than we expect, as he sinks into vapors of self-satisfaction.

But there is one beard we haven’t mentioned, included in none of the previous categories: the empty, patchy beard, where you can count the hairs against broad backdrops of skin. No amount of willpower can ever make such beards thicker, better, their faults being a matter of inheritance. For the Aounists who dislike Bassil that may be the beard that is most appropriate – denoting a hollowness that inherited political power (even from a popular father in law) can little change.

But let’s give Gebran Bassil the benefit of the doubt. His beard is only a few days old, and we shouldn’t judge it until it has reached its full flowering. The republic itself may depend on the final result.